Chapter 36: Coercion
"Stop being difficult."
Gu Yan couldn't bear to see her avoid him. With a long reach, he grasped her slender wrist, pulling her from the bed and into his embrace.
Yan Xuerui was naturally frail, and being ill, her feeble struggles were no more significant to him than a kitten's playful scratch. He reached out to touch her face—it was icy cold.
"At this hour, Furong Pavilion is closed. I'll send someone to invite the pastry chef to the residence."
"Just take your medicine like a good girl, alright?"
The candlelight illuminated his calm face, his thin lips slightly pressed, his dark eyes deep and serene, exuding an air of complete composure.
"Gu Yan, answer me."
Yan Xuerui was pressed against Gu Yan's chest, her hair, black as silk, fanned out behind her, her body trembling slightly. She stubbornly lifted her head to meet his gaze.
As if demanding an explanation from him.
Gu Yan let out a soft chuckle, his expression gentle, yet his eyes held not a trace of warmth.
He repeated the same two words.
"Rui'er, stop being difficult."
Her behavior was uncharacteristic today. Having just returned from the palace, she abruptly brought up "those days." Gu Yan instantly surmised the reason.
As his wife, she had failed to uphold her duties by secretly meeting another man. Considering her poor health, he was willing to overlook it.
After all, the man was as good as dead—why should he bother competing with a corpse?
He had already been so magnanimous and forbearing, yet she dug up old grievances to confront him. In Gu Yan's eyes, this was truly ungrateful.
She deserved punishment.
He pinched her snow-white, delicate chin, a furious laugh escaping him.
"Rui'er, are you now questioning me for the sake of some outsider?"
"Questioning your husband, the father of our three children?"
What was so special about that Fang fellow that she had been fixated on him all these years?
Yan Xuerui had unexpectedly encountered Cousin Fang today. After so many years apart, she had assumed Cousin Fang, with his well-to-do family, upright character, and handsome looks, would be living a peaceful, prosperous life with a wife and children in Yangzhou.
Her youthful affections had long since faded. But she would never forget the young man who endured a caning to save her from her prison. In exchange, she had ceased her fierce resistance to Gu Yan back then. She cooperated with him, obediently allowing him to have his way. He had clearly promised her!
He said he would spare Cousin Fang and the Yan family.
Today, seeing Cousin Fang, everything had changed. The handsome young man's face was disfigured—one eye blinded by fire, one leg broken. A good man, tortured like this—she was shocked, terrified, and filled with guilt. Her mind was utterly shaken, and her body collapsed along with it.
Now that Gu Yan mentioned their three children, Yan Xuerui's tears immediately welled up with grievance, streaming down her pale cheeks.
"Don't mention them to me!"
"Just answer me, why, why…"
Her voice choked, her throat straining to suppress the bitterness. She pressed her hands against Gu Yan's chest, struggling to free herself from his embrace.
Her meager strength meant nothing to Gu Yan. He reached out to wipe her tears, his calloused fingertips pressing too hard, causing her stinging pain.
"What kind of man I am—after sharing a bed for twenty years, don't you know?"
Gu Yan sneered, finding her utterly naive.
A petty scholar—crushing him would be like crushing an ant. Why would he need a reason?
He looked at her. Since she insisted on an explanation, fine, he would give her one.
"Because he coveted you. He dared to covet my woman. The fact that he's still alive and able to appear before you now is due to his good fortune and strong will."
"Though I wonder if his luck will hold out forever."
Gu Yan's voice was as cold as frost. Yan Xuerui's heart sank, and her tear-blurred eyes widened abruptly.
"No."
He still wanted to harm Cousin Fang!
Yan Xuerui had been distraught earlier, waiting solely for Gu Yan's return to confront him. He had clearly promised her—how could he go back on his word?
But Gu Yan couldn't care less. Yes, after sharing a bed for so many years, how could she have forgotten? He was never a gentleman.
He was utterly rotten—how could she reason with him?
She clutched his sleeve, her voice strained. "You can't do this."
"Why can't I?"
Gu Yan looked at her, his gaze sharp and piercing. "Rui'er, think carefully—who is your man?"
Back then, she had wept and threatened suicide over this Fang fellow. Fearing that he might "break the jade while swatting the mouse," he had suppressed his anger and let the boy go—already an act of extraordinary mercy.
He had promised her, and he had indeed kept his word. Who would have thought that Fang would dare to foolishly cross him again? Crushing him was only natural!
Now, twenty years later, they were a harmonious couple. For the sake of such a man, could she really cause trouble like she did back then?
She couldn't.
Gu Yan's voice suddenly softened. He placed his palm on her stomach to warm her, speaking slowly, "Today, you were gone so long from the palace. After Ming Lan finished his duties, he waited for you by the middle gate the entire time."
"You looked unwell and wouldn't speak. That child wanted to use the marquisate's token to get an imperial doctor from the palace. A Yuan had to talk him out of it relentlessly. You had just met with the Emperor—requesting an imperial doctor immediately afterward would hurt your reputation if word got out."
"Tomorrow, when Ming Lan comes to pay his respects and asks why you were distraught yesterday, how will you explain it, hmm?"
"Because of a man? Your old lover? Ming Lan is grown now. At his age, some are already fathers. Poor our Ming Lan, still single. If this matter gets out, how would he handle that?"
No, it wasn't like that.
Yan Xuerui wanted to refute him, but when she opened her mouth, her dry throat couldn't form a single word. Tears simply began to fall again.
Gu Yan wiped her tears and continued, "When I returned, I ran into the nanny from Mother's courtyard. At this hour, she should have been long asleep. Hearing you have chills, she couldn't rest and sent someone to check on you. She might even have to get up and recite scriptures for hours."
"Mother is already past her prime. Must she still worry about us like she did back then?"
Yan Xuerui gripped his sleeve, crumpling the stiff official robe even more. She shook her head, silent, only weeping.
"Alright, no more crying. Be careful, or your eyes will hurt tomorrow."
Tears streamed down like pearls, one by one. Gu Yan leaned down; Yan Xuerui dared not dodge this time, her body stiff and motionless, allowing him to kiss away her tears.
After a moment, there was a knock at the door. Bi He said, "Marquis, the sedative decoction is ready."
Gu Yan pried her fingers open, freeing his sleeve from her grip, opened the door, and took the porcelain bowl. "Fetch two raw eggs and a basin of cold water," he said.
His tall, imposing figure blocked the doorway; Bi He couldn't see inside and had no way of knowing about the drama that had unfolded.
"Yes."
Bi He bowed and retreated. Gu Yan scooped a spoonful, blew on it, and brought it to Yan Xuerui's lips.
Yan Xuerui stared at him with eyes red and swollen, her lips pressed into a tight, pale line.
In the past, given Gu Yan's temper, he would have pried her jaw open and forced it down her throat. But now was different. Gu Yan thought to himself that there was no need for such trouble now.
He said, "Still haven't figured it out? Rui'er, my patience is limited."
They had three children, after all.
Ming Wei's marriage, and their youngest son, who was still so dependent. She was no longer the young girl who could act recklessly without a care. She had too many ties now—even their youngest son's cries were enough to unsettle her. What more did she want to stir up?
Since she couldn't leave him, and she couldn't afford to break with him openly—after all, they still had to play the loving couple in front of Gu Mingwei—Gu Yan felt a pang of regret. If not for the dangers of childbirth and her delicate health, they should have had more children over the years.
It wasn't as if they couldn't afford it. It would be better for her to focus her energy on the children rather than on another man.
Yan Xuerui understood what he meant. She parted her lips and took small sips of the thick medicinal broth. The bitterness spread down her throat, making her choke and cough, staining the front of her robe with dark brown liquid.
Gu Yan set down the bowl and wiped her clean. The powerful Grand Tutor Gu, who wielded immense influence outside, now tended to her with utmost care. Anyone seeing this would remark on his "deep love and devotion."
Yan Xuerui suddenly grabbed his hand. "They... are your own children too."
"You can't use them as bargaining chips to force me."
This was between them; it had nothing to do with the children.
Gu Yan chuckled softly, easily broke free from her grasp, his tone resolute.
"I can."
He scooped another spoonful and fed her, sighing. "Rui'er, my heart is harder than yours."
What he owed his children—such as raising Ming Lan with care, the future control of the Marquis' estate, his wealth, power, and status—would all be passed down to him. Ming Wei could exceptionally study at Egret Mountain Academy; she could do whatever she wished and live freely and unrestrained. As for their Little Young Slave, a toddler who couldn't yet speak, he was surrounded daily by six wet nurses and over a dozen maids and nannies, costing over a hundred taels of silver a month.
He considered himself to have fulfilled his paternal duties.
As for the rest—how his children felt, whether they were happy, whether their marriages were to their liking, if the little one cried a bit more—he didn't give any of that a thought.
He didn't care.
She cared, so she was the one who lost.
The more one cares about something, the more trapped one becomes. He was trapped by her, and she was trapped by their children. Their family was bound inseparably; nothing in this world could tear them apart.
Yan Xuerui closed her eyes in pain. She understood Gu Yan's fearlessness, but she couldn't emulate it.
Perhaps women were born sentimental, or perhaps because mothers endure such hardship in childbirth, the children who emerged from her womb were ones she could never be as ruthless toward as Gu Yan.
She would forever feel guilty toward Cousin Zhixu.
With difficulty, she said, "The marriage with Young Master Fang was arranged by parents and matchmakers. I... I never had much feeling for him."
Gu Yan's expression remained unchanged. "Oh?"
She obediently swallowed another mouthful of medicine. "That's all in the past. We've been married for many years; I haven't entertained any other thoughts for a long time."
"Earlier, I just lost control for a moment. I didn't... I didn't mean to blame you."
She pinched her fingertips, whispering, "Because of what happened between us, he has already suffered for no reason. Please don't trouble him further."
She lowered her head, her silky black hair falling forward, and rubbed her cheek against the back of his hand in a gesture of complete submission.
"Marquis, I beg you. I'll be obedient."
Gu Yan snorted lightly, not committing either way, and fed her spoonful by spoonful until the bowl was empty. Then he lifted his sleeve and wiped her tear-streaked face.
"Close your eyes."
Yan Xuerui lay flat. He rolled the raw eggs over her eyes several times. "You cried so hard today. Do you want to swell your eyes shut by tomorrow?"
"Your family is staying in the west courtyard. Will you face your relatives with red, swollen eyes?"
Yan Xuerui had known the Yan family was coming to the capital but didn't expect them so soon. Her thoughts were in disarray; she couldn't focus on anything else now.
"Marquis, regarding Young Master Fang—"
"If you're tired, sleep. Your health is poor; I'll let it go today."
"Be good. Don't always make me angry."
In the darkness, the man's voice was flat, giving no hint of emotion. Yan Xuerui felt dazed. Clearly, he was the one who had done wrong—how did it end with him not taking issue with her?
But after her bout of crying, her rationality gradually returned. The past was irreversible; the urgent matter now was to save Cousin Zhixu's life and find a doctor to treat him. He was only in his thirties; if cured, he still had many years ahead of him.
Perhaps she could atone a little.
She said softly, "There is no one else. Only you and me."
"You don't like me going out; I won't go out anymore from now on. I'll do whatever you say, Marquis. I'm not pleading for anyone; it's just... you know I've always been tender-hearted."
"In the past, I was immature and misunderstood your intentions, causing Young Master Fang to be innocently implicated. Ultimately, it was my fault."
A long silence followed; Gu Yan said nothing.
Yan Xuerui bit her lip, continuing, "If an innocent person were harmed or killed because of me, my conscience would never be at peace. I would remember him for the rest of my life."
Gu Yan's hand paused; his voice held a trace of mockery. "You certainly have a way with words."
Yan Xuerui said, "I'm speaking the truth. You know me."
Gu Yan remained silent. After a while, the redness and swelling around her eyes gradually subsided. Gu Yan pulled the covers up for her and said, "Rest. I'll sleep in the study."
Yan Xuerui let out a soft sigh of relief. His tone had softened; she thought she had changed his mind. Little did she know, in the shadows where she couldn't see, his face was dark and menacing, a frightening sight.
What did it matter if she remembered him for a lifetime? There was no use competing with a dead man. She was by his side; they would share the same bed in life and the same grave in death. Whoever she held in her heart was her business.
Fang has to die!