With the news that the Grand Duke had woken up safely, the tension surrounding the Grand Duke’s castle vanished like it melted overnight. Thanks to that, the festival plan, which had been sluggish, made progress. The servants were a;; involved in the work, so the castle became busy again.
It was said that this festival was prepared in a slightly different form. Festivals were usually classified into two categories: banquets for nobles, and commoners enjoying themselves in the downtown area. But in the north, because of the harsh weather where cooperation would be taken for granted, it was decided that both nobles and commoners should be able to enjoy it together.
Word of the northern festival spread throughout the empire, and even the theater troupe that toured each region came to the north.
Rumors spread that they were excellent even within the empire, so they became the center of attention. Nobles who had seen the play in other regions said that it was quite worth watching, while those who hadn’t seen it shone with anticipation.
Not just the festival, but even the theater troupe. The people of the northern territory waited for the day the festival was held, without getting tired.
Anne alone wandered like a stranger among their heated atmosphere. It was because her brain was full of complex thoughts. She had no energy to pay attention to anything else.
“Anne, you’re alive.”
From the moment she saw his world-shattered face change to deep relief upon seeing her, his words never left her ears.
Since that day, she had refused to even talk to the Grand Duke.
She didn’t show it at the time, but her heart, which had been stiff ever since she saw his tears, was making a squeaking sound somewhere. It was hard to even look at his face.
“Madam, it seems that your skills aren’t rusty at all. Whether it’s a young master or a young miss, it will suit them very well.”
It was the maid who brought Anne that was lost in thoughts to reality. Before her frantic needle stopped, Emily burst into laughter and busily approached Anne.
Let’s not think about it, she devoted herself to knitting. Not long after, the child’s clothes were finished. But Anne’s eyes on the clothes were far from satisfied.
“I told the handmaid to refer to a baby’s measurements… It still looks too small.”
Unfolding it with her hands, the dainty size clothes, slightly larger than a handkerchief, looked rather small.
“It will be just right. Now, if you just put the Grand Duchy’s pattern on it, it will be perfect.”
“No, I won’t.”
Appreciating the plain white clothes, Anne folded it and put them on the table,
Suddenly, Emily’s expression looked hesitant, as if she had a lot to say, but then she calmed down.
“As a lowly person, I don’t know what Madam is struggling with. But… I hope you don’t suffer so much.”
“I would love to, but it’s not that simple.”
Anne weakly shook her head, answering the words Emily spoke carefully.
“When His Grace was in critical condition, I saw . . . That Madam is still concerned.”
“…”
“And now that he has woken up, you’re still looking for a reason why you can’t forgive His Grace.”
“Am I deliberately not forgiving him?”
She asked back in surprise, but in fact, she couldn’t argue with that. She thought she mustn’t forgive him. Even if it was a misunderstanding, it was because she felt sorry for the child that wasn’t born.
But at some point another thought intervened. She wondered if she was stubborn because of her weak heart that couldn’t admit that it was her fault.
In fact, she was resentful, but implicitly, she was blaming herself. She didn’t ask Daymond directly to confirm the facts, but rather came to her conclusion and ran away with her stupid thoughts.
In the end, it was her, as a weak woman, who made the mistake. It was unbearable that she was such a stupid woman. She couldn’t forgive losing the child because of her foolish judgment.
Anne glanced at Emily’s stomach. Suddenly, a question that she had been ignoring all along thinking that it would hurt her came to mind.
“Emily… How can you be okay now?”
She wanted to ask how Emily could smile when in fact she had lost a child. The quick-witted Emily smiled wryly— she understood the meaning right away.
“I wondered when Madam would ask. Because you saw me with child.”
She began calmly to unravel what had happened years ago, and it was the same with Anne’s prediction that she had lost the child.
“Then have you forgotten everything now?”
“I didn’t forget it, it was just buried in my heart. So that I can take it out at any time.”
‘“It must have been… Very hard.”
“At first, I hated myself because I thought it was all my fault. But again, as time passed, I found out on my own. It wasn’t about whose fault, it was just sad all around. I stopped blaming myself when I realized that it was no one’s fault.”
“…”
“Even if Madam thinks it’s nonsense. Still, I believe that the child would have been reborn in a good place other than this ugly mother. Oops, I said too much in front of the pregnant Madam.”
A slightly embarrassed Emily tried to smile, wiping her tears with her sleeve. Hearing her voice permeated with tears, Anne pulled her into a hug and patted her back.
”No. I believe it. Emily’s baby will be born again and will be growing very nicely.”
It wasn’t a consolation or a lie. Reincarnation. She herself was a living witness.
Anne hugged Emily who had swallowed her tears for a long time. And her confession made Anne’s feelings more complicated.
* * *
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